Without the 1.5 HP Electric Pole Saw, Alexander the Great may not have been so great! According to a dusty scroll found three days ago in the backroom of an Albanian spice merchant’s warehouse along the Adriatic, Alexander III of Macedon (A3 as he was called) inherited the kingdom from his father Phillip II who had been assassinated. Upon being named successor to the throne, A3 walked out to his backyard and there stood an olive tree that reached toward the sky. He declared “I will climb this tree and as far as I can see, I will conquer!” A bold statement. Unfortunately, the tree was so dense with branches, he could only climb up a few feet. From that vantage point, he was able to see as far as two of his neighbors’ yards, which he summarily conquered. He was then called Alexander the Terrible Neighbor.
In order to climb higher, Alexander the Terrible Neighbor needed to get rid of those darn branches. He went to Harbor Freight Tools, which had a store in Amphipolis, and purchased the 1.5 HP Electric Pole Saw. Well, it wasn’t actually electric back then, but the motor did come with a horse and a pony, hence, 1.5 horsepower. Anyway, he went back to the olive tree and started to cut more branches. Alexander was impressed with the features of the Pole Saw, which included a telescoping fiber glass pole that extended from 6 ft. to 8ft. 10 inches in length, 9-1/2 inch bar with 3/8 inch pitch Oregon® chain, automatic chain oiler, reduced kickback design, hand guard and easy chain adjustment. Midway through a branch, the saw broke but Alexander the Terrible Neighbor had kept his receipt so he returned the broken saw to the store and received a replacement without any hassle.
Back to the tree. He finished up cutting and then climbed. This time he was able to see as far as the subcontinent of India. He then sent messengers to all credit card companies and wireless carriers throughout his current empire and vowed that when he conquered India, he would establish customer service centers for all of them. The outsourcing saved these companies millions of drachma. As a reward, the Macedonian Better Business Bureau awarded Alexander a Lucite plaque and dubbed him Alexander the Great.
Today, you only need to conquer street traffic or a slow Internet connection to behold the 1.5 HP Electric Pole Saw from Harbor Freight Tools. Not only will you enjoy the fabulous features and ease of use, but you’ll become the envy of your neighbors, provided you leave their yards alone.
1.5 HP Electric Pole Saw